As you know i am participating in
Nailing November where i will be working on breaking bad habits once and for all. For those of you that have been following my crazy journey for some time now will know that my bad habit/addiction is to do with binging.
I woke up yesterday morning to such a lovely and thoughtful email from my good friend Jason Urbanowicz that i just had to share it with you:
Great article Chelle!
After spending the last 10 years working in this field, i would like to share a snap shot of my understanding of addictions. Most addictions are there to suppress emotional pain and they provide a brief moment of ecstasy. The problem is, people try and address it at the addiction level, instead of what's underneath it.
Example:(nicotine) Smoking suppresses anger! So dealing with and letting go of the anger is one of the main keys here.
Emotions along with your programming or beliefs (habits if you like) all live in your subconscious and use around 50%-60% of your total brainpower. This is why will power doesn't work for breaking addictions long term. Why? Because it operates in your conscious part of you’re brain, using only 10% of your total brain capacity.
Although emotional intelligence is gaining strength in this day and age, it severely lacks as part of our educational upbringing. So, if you don't know how to deal with your emotions in a healthy way,then what do you do to deal with them? Smoking, drinking, chocolate, shopping, over exercising, porn and the list can go on.
Here are my tips to start with: Once you acknowledge you have an addiction to something (like chelle mentioned) next time you get the urge, simply wait long enough (which is code for, stop yourself) and see what emotion/s you experience. Then deal with the emotion/s!
Now, this can be very confronting the first few times. Remember, these emotions are the very thing you have been trying to avoid feeling in the first place.So be patience and gentle on yourself. Mastering this area of your life is the thing that will set you free of being hijacked by your emotions and addictions.
I recommend reading up on emotional intelligence or doing workshops in this area.
Example: If i realize that i have some built up anger or suppressed anger, instead of taking out on the people i care most about or doing road rage, i grab my punching bag, lye it on the floor and using a hammer fist (so i don't injury myself) i get out the anger. Go until you are buggered.
The most important part of this is expressing myself in the process. So i say what i wanted to say in a past situation, but didn't at the time. The healing is in the expression of the feeling. Doing it this way means no one gets to lose and it is done with honor. Not to mention a great workout and you will drain your anger pool.
There are different types of methods; maybe you would prefer to write your feelings. You really need to find your own safe way to express your emotions.
The same goes for sadness, guilt (which is really anger turn inwards) fear, they all need to be expressed in a healthy manner. Sadness is an easy one, simply cry until you have nothing left, (why do you think people hire sad movies, so they can have a good cry in a dark room) Fear, the best way to let go of fear is to express it or speak it out! The more you try and pretend you are OK, the worst it will get. Alcohol is a great one for suppressing fear, but not a great way to deal with it.
Part Two!
My second tip is set yourself up for success!
We all have an internal scoreboard that keeps track of everything we say and do or should i say don't do. So when a person say's that's it, starting next Monday, i am going to get fit for the rest of my life. There could be a little voice that say's bullshit, that's what you said the last 25 times and you lasted two days. Keep small promises to yourself to build up a healthy internal belief system. At the start of building a new habit, it is more important to keep your word to yourself then the actual target or goal.
Example: When i used to work helping Drug addicts get clean, if you said to them that they can never shoot up again, it was simply to big for them to handle (even if that's what they really want) Why? Because they had said that very thing to themselves before and had proof that they had failed. So there internal scoreboard is out of whack!
So, i used to ask them, what could you manage. one might say, i reckon i can go three days. I would say, that's great, when you get to the three days, we will see where to from there. At the three-day mark, i asked the same question! This time it may have been 5 days and so on! They would write there success in what i call a victory book,(exercise pad) which speaks to your subconscious and goes towards changing programming and creating a new habit and a strong internal belief.
Anyway, that is a lot more than i expected to write. Hope it helps!
Jason and business partner
Brad Sheppard (yes the one that charges $440 an hour for a PT session!) run
Create PT Wealth, a company dedicated to handing fitness professionals the tools to skyrocket their business. In a nutshell, they teach you the strategies to earn a six-figure income whilst working less then 20 hours of PT per week.
Check out their website -
Create PT Wealth
You can also find them
here on facebook.
